swaddling clothes and a GPS implant
This season all the coolest manger displays feature a Christ-child with a bit of real-politick protection: a GPS implant that allows a speedy recovery of the boy-savior in case of pranksters being tempted to pilfer.
Gold, frankincense, and myrrh are small-time loot. Go straight for the Son of God!
That lamb on the right sure looks happy. I remember feeling that way about the holidays.